I'd Mr Theresa Carly Ethan Paul David Christmas Michael Luis Natalie Sheridan Julian Jason George Ross Brooke Niles Todd Alison Rick Rose Frasier Danny Miguel Cristian Greenlee Emily Timmy Chris Kay Find out what time that is for you. Low hanging fruit - a thing or person that can be won, obtained, or persuaded with little effort. So TheCookieOfDoom shared a glorious photo of a tied up not-Stiles linked here , SFW in that he's wearing pants , and I kind of threw this short little thing together in response.
Apologies for the wildly OOC Sheriff! They shift in discomfort, muttering vague excuses. He sent two powerful werewolves to retrieve one human boy, and specifically told them to be gentle. The betas squirm more and Jackson, as always, caves first. Erica shrugs in agreement. The Stilinski boy looks up at Peter, eyes hooded, and smirks around the black tape covering his mouth. At least his wayward enforcers remembered to use the body-safe kind.
He dismisses Jackson and Erica, then turns back to his pretty little captive. Slipping your bodyguard to go jogging at the edge of my territory for weeks on end—wearing Airpods and oblivious to your surroundings at that.
When their eyes meet again, he winks. Taken aback, Peter scents the air. Mainly, he smells of healthy sweat with an undercurrent of anticipation. Peter frowns. No need for Stilinski senior to accuse Peter of damaging the merchandise. Peter looks the boy over again, eyes catching on pale skin, dusty-pink nipples, trim abs, and narrow hips. He takes in the rapid expansion of pupils, quickened breath, and blooming scent of arousal. Peter uses his hold to lift the boy to his feet, already devising a new plan.
Leading him to a chair, Peter gets him comfortably settled, then crouches down to put them at eye-level. He takes a moment to examine the desire reflected back at him. Oh, yes. This is definitely going to be worth it. Thus far we have seen how efficiently the limbic system helps us to deal with threats. Observe someone resting in a hammock on a breezy day. His body reflects the high comfort being experienced by his brain. On the other hand, when we feel distressed discomfort , the limbic brain expresses nonverbal behavior that mirrors our negative state of being.
Just watch people at the airport when a flight is canceled or delayed. Their bodies say it all. Therefore, we want to learn to look more closely at the comfort and discomfort behaviors we see every day and use them to assess for feelings, thoughts, and intentions. In general, when the limbic brain is in a state of comfort, this mental and physiological well-being is reflected in nonverbal displays of contentment and high confidence.
When, however, the limbic brain is experiencing discomfort, the corresponding body language is characterized by behaviors emblematic of stress or low confidence. As you study nonverbal behavior, you will discover that whenever there is a limbic response—especially to a negative or threatening experience—it will be followed by what I call pacifying behaviors Navarro, , — In doing so, it compiles and maintains a record of negative events and experiences a burned finger from a hot stove, an assault by a human or animal predator, or even hurtful comments as well as pleasant encounters.
Using this information, the limbic brain allows us to navigate a dangerous and often unforgiving world Goleman, , 10— For example, once the limbic system registers an animal as dangerous, that impression becomes embedded in our emotional memory so that the next time we see that animal, we will react instantly.
The reason it is often difficult to forget when someone has hurt us is because that experience registers in the more primitive limbic system, which is the part of the brain designed not to reason but to react Goleman, , I recently encountered an individual with whom I was never on the best of terms.
It had been four years since I had last seen this person, yet my visceral limbic reactions were just as negative as they had been years ago. My brain was reminding me that this individual takes advantage of others, so it was warning me to stay away. This phenomenon is precisely what Gavin de Becker was talking about in his insightful book, The Gift of Fear.
Conversely, the limbic system also works efficiently to register and retain a record of positive events and experiences e. Thus, a friendly or familiar face will cause an immediate reaction—a sense of pleasure and well-being. Since these are outward signals that can be read in real time, we can observe and decode them immediately and in context. Pacifying is not unique to our species. For example, cats and dogs lick themselves and each other to pacify.
Humans engage in much more diverse pacification behaviors. Some are very obvious, while others are much more subtle. That is unfortunate. To be successful at reading nonverbal behavior, learning to recognize and decode human pacifiers is absolutely critical.
I look for pacifying behaviors in people to tell me when they are not at ease or when they are reacting negatively to something I have done or said. In an interview situation, such a display might be in response to a specific question or comment. Behaviors that signal discomfort e. I look for these behaviors to confirm what is going on in the mind of the person with whom I am dealing. But I do know that he is bothered by the inquiry, so much so that he has to pacify himself after he hears it.
This will prompt me to probe further into this area of inquiry. Pacifying behaviors are important for an investigator to note, since sometimes they help uncover a lie or hidden information. I find pacifying indicators of greater significance and reliability than trying to establish veracity.
When women pacify using the neck, they often do so by covering or touching their suprasternal notch with their hand see figure 7.
This is a relatively significant behavioral clue that can be used to detect, among other things, the discomfort experienced when a person is lying or concealing important information. We showed our identification and began asking her a series of questions. To make absolutely sure my assumption was correct, we continued to speak with the woman until, as we prepared to leave, I made one last inquiry.
I was now certain the woman was lying. I asked for permission to search the house and, sure enough, her son was hiding in a closet under some blankets.
She was lucky she was not charged with obstruction of justice. Knowing these can often lead to evincing information previously hidden that might give us new insights. Types of Pacifying Behaviors Pacifying behaviors take many forms. When stressed, we might soothe our necks with a gentle massage, stroke our faces, or play with our hair.
This is done automatically. Sometimes we pacify by rubbing our cheeks or our lips from the inside with our tongues, or we exhale slowly Fig. Playing with a necklace often serves the same purpose.
Notice how often people do this after a near mishap. If a stressed person is a smoker, he or she will smoke more; if the person chews gum, he or she will chew faster. All these pacifying behaviors satisfy the same requirement of the brain; that is, the brain requires the body to do something that will stimulate nerve endings, releasing calming endorphins in the brain, so that the brain can be soothed Panksepp, , For our purposes, any touching of the face, head, neck, shoulder, arm, hand, or leg in response to a negative stimulus e.
In other words, they soothe us. Men prefer to touch their faces. Women prefer to touch their necks, clothing, jewelry, arms, and hair. When it comes to pacifiers, people have personal favorites, some choose to chew gum, smoke cigarettes, eat more food, lick their lips, rub their chins, stroke their faces, play with objects pens, pencils, lipstick, or watches , pull their hair, or scratch their forearms.
Sometimes pacification is even more subtle, like a person brushing the front of his shirt or adjusting his tie see figure It also covers the suprasternal notch. These, too, are pacifying behaviors ultimately governed by the limbic system and exhibited in response to stress.
Below are some of the most common and pronounced pacifying behaviors. This area is rich with nerve endings that, when stroked, reduce blood pressure, lower the heart rate, and calm the individual down see figures 13 and This area is rich with nerves, including the vagus nerve, which when massaged will slow down the heart rate.
Over the decades that I have studied nonverbal behaviors, I have observed that there are gender differences in the way men and women use the neck to pacify themselves. Typically, men are more robust in their pacifying behaviors, grasping or cupping their necks just beneath the chin with their hands, thereby stimulating the nerves specifically, the vagus nerves or the carotid sinus of the neck, which in turn slow the heart rate down and have a calming effect.
Sometimes men will stroke the sides or the back of the neck with their fingers, or adjust their tie knot or shirt collar see figure Women pacify differently.
For example, when women pacify using the neck, they will sometimes touch, twist, or otherwise manipulate a necklace, if they are wearing one see box As mentioned, the other major way women neck pacify is by covering their suprasternal notch with their hand.
Interestingly, when a woman is pregnant, I have observed that her hand will initially move toward her neck but at the last moment will divert to her belly, as if to cover the fetus. If the woman begins to play with her necklace, most likely she is a little nervous. But if she transitions her fingers to her neck dimple suprasternal notch , chances are there is an issue of concern to her or she feels very insecure.
In most instances, if she is using her right hand on her suprasternal notch, she will cup her right elbow with her left hand. When the stressful situation is over or there is an intermission in the uncomfortable part of the discussion, her right hand will lower and relax across her folded left arm. If the situation again becomes tense, her right hand will rise, once again, to the suprasternal notch. From a distance, the arm movement looks like the needle on a stress meter, moving from resting on the arm to the neck upright and back again, according to the level of stress experienced.
Neck touching or massaging is a powerful and universal stress reliever and pacifier. Motions such as rubbing the forehead; touching, rubbing, or licking the lip s ; pulling or massaging the earlobe with thumb and forefinger; stroking the face or beard; and playing with the hair all can serve to pacify an individual when confronting a stressful situation. As mentioned before, some individuals will pacify by puffing out their cheeks and then slowly exhaling. The plentiful supply of nerve endings in the face make it an ideal area of the body for the limbic brain to recruit to comfort itself.
Pacifying Behaviors Involving Sounds Whistling can be a pacifying behavior. Some people whistle to calm themselves when they are walking in a strange area of a city or down a dark, deserted corridor or road. Some people even talk to themselves in an attempt to pacify during times of stress. I have a friend as I am sure we all do who can talk a mile a minute when nervous or upset. Some behaviors combine tactile and auditory pacification, such as the tapping of a pencil or the drumming of fingers.
Excessive Yawning Sometimes we see individuals under stress yawning excessively. The stretch of various structures in and around the mouth causes the glands to release moisture into a dry mouth during times of anxiety.
In this calming or pacifying activity, a person places the hand or hands palm down on top of the leg or legs , and then slides them down the thighs toward the knee see figure It may also be done to dry off sweaty palms associated with anxiety, but principally it is to get rid of tension. This nonverbal behavior is worth looking for, because it is a good indication that someone is under stress. One way to try and spot this Fig. Often missed under tables, it is a very accurate indicator of discomfort or anxiety.
If they are doing leg cleansing, you will normally see the upper arm and shoulder moving in conjunction with the hand as it rubs along their leg. In my experience, I find the leg cleanser to be very significant because it occurs so quickly in reaction to a negative event.
I have observed this action for years in cases when suspects are presented with damning evidence, such as pictures of a crime scene with which they are already familiar guilty knowledge. It dries sweaty palms and pacifies through tactile stroking. You can also see it when a seated couple is bothered or interrupted by an unwelcome intruder, or when someone is struggling to remember a name.
An increase in either the number or vigor of leg cleansers is a very good indicator that a question has caused some sort of discomfort for the person, either because he has guilty knowledge, is lying, or because you are getting close to something he does not want to discuss see box The behavior might also occur because the interviewee is distressed over what he is required to answer in response to our questions.
So, keep an eye on what goes on under the table by monitoring the movement of the arms. You will be surprised at how much you can glean from these behaviors. Heed this cautionary note about leg cleansing.
While it is certainly seen in people who are being deceptive, I have also observed it in innocent individuals who are merely nervous, so be careful not to jump to any conclusions too quickly Frank et al. Everything was going well until, toward the end of the interview, the candidate began talking about networking and the importance of the Internet. At that point, the employer noticed that the candidate did a vigorous leg cleansing with his right hand, wiping it along his thigh several times.
The employer said nothing at the time, thanked the young man for the interview, and walked him out of the office. Sure enough, it was. And it was not flattering! This ventilating action is often a reaction to stress and is a good indicator that the person is unhappy with something he is thinking about or experiencing in his environment.
A woman may perform this nonverbal activity more subtly by merely ventilating the front of her blouse or by tossing the back of her hair up in the air to ventilate her neck. The Self-Administered Body-Hug When facing stressful circumstances, some individuals will pacify by crossing their arms and rubbing their hands against their shoulders, as if experiencing a chill.
Watching a person employ this pacifying behavior is reminiscent of the way a mother hugs a young child. However, if you see a person with his arms crossed in front, leaning forward, and giving you a defiant look, this is not a pacifying behavior!
I have provided you with all of the major pacifiers. As you make a concerted effort to spot these body signals, they will become increasingly easy to recognize in interactions with other people. Your job, as a collector of nonverbal intelligence, is to find out what that something is. Thus, as a general principle, you can assume that if an individual is engaged in pacifying behavior, some stressful event or stimulus has preceded it and caused it to happen. This is significant, because the higher the stress, the greater the amount of facial or neck stroking is involved.
Pacifiers are a great way to assess for comfort and discomfort. Yet they reveal much about our emotional state and how we are truly feeling.
We are fortunate to have these mechanisms, not only for our own survival and success, but also to use in assessing the sentiments and thoughts of others. In this chapter, we also learned that with the exception of certain reflexes all behavior is governed by the brain. Both brains perform important functions. However, for our purposes, the limbic system is more important because it is the most honest brain—responsible for producing the most significant nonverbal signals for determining true thoughts and feelings Ratey, , — Now that you are familiar with the basics of how the brain reacts to the world, you might be wondering if detecting and decoding nonverbal behaviors is all that easy to do.
This is a frequently asked question. The answer is yes and no. They literally scream for attention. On the other hand, there are many aspects of body language that are more subtle and, therefore, more difficult to spot. We will focus on both the more obvious and the more subtle behaviors that the limbic brain elicits from the body. In time and with practice, decoding them will become natural, like looking both ways before you cross a busy street.
This brings us to our legs and feet, which propel us across the intersection and provide the focal point of our attention in the next chapter. It may surprise you, but the answer is the feet! Now I will explain how to gauge the sentiments and intentions of others by focusing on their foot and leg actions.
They are the principal means by which we have maneuvered, escaped, and survived. Since the time our ancestors began to walk upright across the grasslands of Africa, the human foot has carried us, quite literally, around the world.
Marvels of engineering, our feet allow us to feel, walk, turn, run, swivel, balance, kick, climb, play, grasp, and even write. And while not as efficient at certain tasks as our hands we lack an opposable big toe , nevertheless, as Leonardo da Vinci once commented, our feet and what they can perform are a testament to exquisite engineering Morris, , The writer and zoologist Desmond Morris observed that our feet communicate exactly what we think and feel more honestly than any other part of our bodies Morris, , Why are the feet and legs such accurate reflectors of our sentiments?
For millions of years, long before humans spoke, our legs and feet reacted to environmental threats e. Our limbic brains made sure that our feet and legs reacted as needed by either ceasing motion, running away, or kicking at a potential threat. This survival regimen, retained from our ancestral heritage, has served us well and continues to do so today. In fact, these age-old reactions are still so hardwired in us that when we are presented with something dangerous or even disagreeable, our feet and legs still react as they did in prehistoric times.
First they freeze, then they attempt to distance, and finally, if no other alternative is available, they prepare to fight and kick. This freeze, flight, or fight mechanism requires no high-order cognitive processing. It is reactive. This important evolutionary development benefited the individual as well as the group.
Humans survived by seeing and responding to the same threat simultaneously or by reacting to the vigilant actions of others and behaving accordingly. When he lunges for the side of the road, they also take cover. When he charges an ambush, they react in kind. With regard to these life-saving group behaviors, little has changed in five million years.
This ability to communicate nonverbally has assured our survival as a species, and even though today we often cover our legs with clothing and our feet with shoes, our lower limbs still react—not only to threats and stressors—but also to emotions, both negative and positive. Thus, our feet and legs transmit information about what we are sensing, thinking, and feeling.
The dancing and jumping up and down we do today are extensions of the celebratory exuberance people exhibited millions of years ago upon the completion of a successful hunt. Be they Masai warriors jumping high in place or couples dancing up a storm, throughout the world, the feet and legs communicate happiness. We even stomp our feet in unison at ball games to let our team know we are rooting for them.
For example, watch children and their foot movements for a real education in feet honesty. A child may be sitting down to eat, but if she wants to go out and play, notice how her feet sway, how they stretch to reach the floor from a high chair even when the child is not yet finished with her meal. Her torso may be held by that loving parent, but the youngster will twist and squirm her legs and feet ever so diligently in the direction of the door—an accurate reflection of where she wants to go.
This is an intention cue. As adults, we are, of course, more restrained in these limbic exhibitions, but just barely so. My approach is the exact opposite. When it comes to honesty, truthfulness decreases as we move from the feet to the head. Unfortunately, law enforcement literature over the last sixty years, including some contemporary works, has emphasized a facial focus when conducting interviews or attempting to read people.
Further complicating an honest read is the fact that most interviewers compound the problem by allowing the interviewees to conceal their feet and legs under tables and desks. Our parents—and society—are, in essence, telling us to hide, deceive, and lie with our faces for the sake of social harmony. So it is no surprise that we tend to get pretty good at it, so good, in fact, that when we put on a happy face at a family gathering, we might look as if we love our in-laws when, in reality, we are fantasizing about how to hasten their departure.
Think about it. We know how to put on a so-called party face, but few pay any attention to their own feet and legs, much less to those of others. Nervousness, stress, fear, anxiety, caution, boredom, restlessness, happiness, joy, hurt, shyness, coyness, humility, awkwardness, confidence, subservience, depression, lethargy, playfulness, sensuality, and anger can all manifest through the feet and legs.
A meaningful touch of the legs between lovers, the shy feet of a young boy meeting strangers, the stance of the angry, the nervous pacing of an expectant father—all of these signal our emotional state and can be readily observed in real time. The lower limbs must be viewed as a significant part of the entire body when collecting nonverbal intelligence.
Happy feet are a high-confidence tell, a signal that a person feels he is getting what he wants or is in an advantageous position to gain something of value from another person or from something else in his environment see box Lovers seeing each other after a long separation will get happy feet at their airport reunion. If his feet are wiggling or bouncing, his shirt and shoulders will be vibrating or moving up and down.
These are not grossly exaggerated movements; in fact, they are relatively subtle. But if you watch for them, they are discernible. Try this little demonstration for yourself. Sit in a chair in front of a fulllength mirror and begin wiggling or bouncing your feet. Allow me to express two points of caution. Below the table, his feet were going wild! Meanwhile, I was pointing at the TV set and urging the other players to fold their hands and get out of the game.
This player has learned how to put on his best poker face. Obviously, however, he has a long way to go when it comes to putting on his best poker feet. Fortunately for him, his opponents—like most people—have spent a lifetime ignoring three-quarters of the human body from the chest on down , paying no attention to the critical nonverbal tells that can be found there. I have seen them in plenty of meeting rooms and boardrooms and just about everywhere else.
While writing this chapter, I was at the airport and overheard a young mother sitting next to me as she was talking on her cell phone to members of her family. At first, her feet were flat on the ground, but when her son got on the phone, her feet began bouncing up and down effusively.
I did not need her to tell me how she felt about her child or his priority in her life. Her feet shouted it to me. She put her new knowledge to good use just a few days after returning to her job. The candidate was astounded. Did someone else say something to you? If the rate or intensity of jiggling increases, however, particularly right after a person hears or witnesses something of significance, I might view that as a potential signal that he or she now feels more confident and satisfied with the current state of affairs.
Second, moving feet and legs may simply signify impatience. Our feet often jiggle or bounce when we grow impatient or feel the need to move things along. Watch a class full of students and notice how often their legs and feet will twitch, jiggle, move, and kick throughout the class. This activity usually increases as the class draws to a close.
Such activity reaches a crescendo as dismissal time approaches in my classes. Perhaps the students are trying to tell me something. When Feet Shift Direction, Particularly Toward or Away from a Person or Object We tend to turn toward things we like or are agreeable to us, and that includes individuals with whom we are interacting.
In fact, we can use this information to determine whether others are happy to see us or would prefer that we leave them alone. Assume you are approaching two people engaged in a conversation. Is there a way to find out? Watch their feet and torso behavior. If they move their feet—along with their torsos—to admit you, then the welcome is full and genuine.
What is true for jurors in a courtroom is also true for person-to-person interactions in general. From the hips up, we will face the person with whom we are talking. But if we are displeased with the conversation, our feet will shift away, toward the nearest exit. When a person turns his feet away, it is normally a sign of disengagement, a desire to distance himself from where he is currently positioned. Why did the behavior take place?
Sometimes it is a signal that the person is late for an appointment and really has to go; other times it is a sign that the person no longer wants to be around you. Perhaps you have said something offensive or done something annoying. The shifting foot behavior is a sign that the person wants to depart see figure However, now it is up to you—based on the circumstances surrounding the behavior—to determine why the individual is anxious to go see box If, however, one of the individuals turns his feet slightly away or repeatedly moves one foot in an outward direction in an L formation with one foot toward you and one away from you , you can be assured he wants to take leave or wishes he were somewhere else.
This type of foot behavior is another example of an intention cue Givens, , 60— Recently I was with a client who had spent almost five hours with me. As we were parting for the evening, we reflected on what we had covered that day.
Even though our conversation was very collegial, I noticed that my client was holding one leg at a right angle to his body, seemingly wanting to take off on its own. His feet, however, were the most honest communicators, and they clearly told me that as much as he wanted to stay, duty was calling. The Knee Clasp There are other examples of intention movements of the legs that are associated with an individual who wants to leave his current location.
Take note if a person who is sitting down places both hands on his knees in a knee clasp see figure This is a very clear sign that in his mind, he is ready to conclude the meeting and take leave. Gravity-Defying Behaviors of the Feet When we are happy and excited, we walk as if we are floating on air. We see this with lovers enthralled to be around each other as well as with children who are eager to enter a theme park.
Gravity seems to hold no boundaries for those who are excited. These behaviors are quite obvious, and yet every day, all around us, gravity-defying behaviors seemingly elude our observation. When we are excited about something or feel very positive about our circumstances, we tend to defy gravity by doing such things as rocking up and down on the balls of our feet, or walking with a bit of a bounce in our step.
This is the limbic brain, once again, manifesting itself in our nonverbal behaviors. Recently I was watching a stranger talk on his cell phone. As he listened, his left foot, which had been resting flat on the ground, changed position. To the average person, that behavior would have gone unnoticed or been disregarded as insignificant.
But to the trained observer, that gravity-defying foot behavior can be readily decoded to mean that the man on the phone had just heard something positive. Even when standing still, a person telling a story may inch up to a taller stance, elevating himself to emphasize his points, and he may do so repeatedly.
The individual does this subconsciously; therefore these elevating behaviors are very honest cues, since they tend to be true expres- Fig. They appear in real time along with the story line and relate his feelings along with his words. Just as we move our feet to the beat and tempo of a song we like, so too will we move our feet and legs in congruence with something positive we say. Interestingly, gravity-defying behaviors of the feet and legs are rarely seen in people suffering from clinical depression.
The body reflects precisely the emotional state of the individual. So when people are excited we tend to see many more gravity-defying behaviors. Can gravity-defying behaviors be faked? When people try to control their limbic reactions or gravity-defying behaviors, it looks contrived.
Either they appear too passive or restrained for the situation or not animated enough. It looks fake because the arms are not up for very long, and usually the elbows are bent.
The gesture has all the hallmarks of being contrived. This is an intention cue that tells us the person is getting ready to do something physical, requiring foot movement. It could mean the individual intends to engage you further, is really interested, or wants to leave. As with all nonverbal intention cues, once you learn a person is about to do something, you need to rely on the context and what you know about the individual to make your best assessment of what that something is going to be.
Leg Splay The most unmistakable and easily spotted foot and leg behaviors are territorial displays. In each case, they will exhibit behaviors indicating they are trying to reestablish control of their situation and their territory. Law enforcement and military personnel use these behaviors because they are accustomed to being in charge.
Sometimes, they will try to outdo each other, at which point it becomes farcical as each person tries to splay out wider than his colleagues in a subconscious attempt to claim more territory.
When people find themselves in confrontational situations, their feet and legs will splay out, not only for greater balance but also to claim greater territory. This sends out a very strong message to the careful observer that at a minimum there are issues afoot or that there is potential for real trouble. When two people face off in disagreement, you will never see their legs crossed so that they are off balance.
The limbic brain simply will not allow this to take place. Because people often assume a more splayed posture when an argument escalates, I tell executives as well as law enforcement officers that one way to diffuse a confrontation is to avoid using such territorial displays. If we catch ourselves in a leg-splay posture during a heated exchange and immediately bring our legs together, it often lessens the confrontation level and reduces the tension.
A few years ago, while I was conducting a seminar, a woman in the audience spoke about how her ex-husband used to intimidate her during an argument by standing in the doorway of their house, legs splayed, blocking her exit. This is not a behavior to be taken lightly. It resonates visually as well as viscerally and can be used to control, intimidate, and threaten. In fact, predators e. There are, of course, times when a leg splay can be used to your advantage—specifically, when you want to establish authority and control over others for a positive reason.
I have had to coach female law enforcement officers to use the leg splay to establish a more aggressive stance when responding to unruly crowds in the line of duty. Standing with their feet together which is perceived as submissive sends the wrong kind of signal to a would-be antagonist.
You may want to emphasize to a teenage son how you feel about smoking not by raising your voice, but rather by using a territorial display. By studying what he termed the territorial imperative, he was able to document our spatial needs, which he referred to as proxemics Hall, Hall found that the more advantaged we are socioeconomically or hierarchically, the more territory we demand.
He also found that people who tend to take up more space territory through their daily activities also tend to be more self-assured, more confident, and of course more likely to be of higher status.
This phenomenon has been demonstrated throughout human history and in most cultures. In fact, the conquistadores witnessed it when they arrived in the new world. While CEOs, presidents, and high-status individuals can claim greater space, for the rest of us, it is not so easy.
All of us, however, are very protective of our personal space, regardless of its size. In his research, Edward Hall found that each of us has a space requirement he called proxemics, that is both personal and cultural in origin.
When people violate that space, we have powerful limbic reactions indicative of stress. We also cross our legs in the presence of others when we are confident— and confidence is part of comfort. When you cross one leg in front of the other while standing, you reduce your balance significantly. From a safety standpoint, if there were a real threat, you could neither freeze very easily nor run away because, in that stance, you are basically balanced on one foot.
For this reason, the limbic brain allows us to perform this behavior only when we feel comfortable or confident. If a person is standing by herself in an elevator with one leg crossed over the other, she will immediately uncross her legs and plant both feet firmly on the floor when a stranger steps into the elevator. First, Fig. This leg-cross nonverbal can be used in interpersonal relationships to let the other person know that things are good between the two of you, so good, in fact, that you can afford to relax totally limbically around that individual.
Leg crossing, then, becomes a great way to communicate a positive sentiment.
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